Thursday, December 6, 2007

Pick "Meme!"

So I was the gawky, overachiever girl in high school. You know, the one with the googly eyes, funny glasses, too-frizzy hair, too chubby thighs, too smart for her own good girl. And in the sun-bleached, ultra-thin land of Southern California, this was not a good thing to be. Nope. I'd have been better off in some place like Samoa. Not because Samoans have funny eyes or anything, but at least in an excessively humid place like Samoa where people are genetically inclined towards being bigger sized, my thighs and hair would've fit in. Two out of five or more ain't bad.

Anyway, because of all of these traits and more, I never really felt like I "fit in." Then again, who did, right? Actually, if you asked my super-cool, ruggedly handsome, awesome jock of a brother, he'd probably say, "Dude. I did." And he did. He really did.

But I digress. Like I said, I never really "fit in." I mean I had my cliques and all, just like all of us, but they were things like the speech & debate team, or the newspaper staff, or the drama club. Translation: the nerds, the bookworms, and the freaks. Not exactly the "in" crowd if you know what I mean.

And lately, I've been feeling like that same frizzy-haired, googly-eyed, awkward young girl. Only this time, it's virtual. That's right. It's bad enough that I don't feel like I fit in with the ultra-conservative, somewhat redneck mommy cliques in this small Southern town of mine. But now I'm wondering if I truly belong to the mommy blogging cliques of the world out there. And here's why.... one tags me for any "memes." Hell, I didn't even know what a, "meme," was until my friend Karen wrote about it. But that aside, I love reading about your, "8 interesting facts," or your, "alphabet descriptions," or your, "have you ever..." And since I've never been tagged for a, "meme," before, I'm not jaded by them yet.

So here I am to say to the blogging world as I stand in line with the other chubby, too-smart, awkward girls waiting to be picked by the captains, "Pick me. Meme me! I promise I won't let you down!"

Oh. And being one to take matters into my own hands, here's a, "meme," for all of you.

10 Things That Describe Where I live:

1. There are 4 Walmarts within a 10 mile radius of my house.
2. All 4 of them are Walmart "Supercenters."
3. There are 5 car parts stores within a 5 mile radius of my house.
4. They too are "Supercenters."
5. My state is ranked 48th for quality of education.
6. But 5th nationwide for obesity. I think the state food is Southern-fried chicken wrapped in bacon, deep-fried in cheese, and served in buttermilk.
7. And 13th for human lightning strikes.
8. There are 9 ultra-conservative Christian churches within a 5 mile radius of my house.
9. They are all "Supercenters."
10. And even though we live in an upper-middle class part of town, there are 4 trailer parks within a 10 mile radius, all considered upper-middle class because they largely consist of "double-wides."

I think Jeff Foxworthy, the original Redneck, might actually be from here.
Welcome home "ya'll."
Oh, and I'm tagging, Karen, Amanda, and Slouching Mom.


Amanda said...

Damn, woman, remind me again why you live there? Other than the fact that you can get diesel, deep-fried religion without leaving the range of your remote control.

slouching mom said...

I'm going to have to decline to do this meme, as clever as it is, because I am under strict instructions from my husband to keep my town under wraps. If I wrote about my town, there is just NO way that you wouldn't know where I live.

But I will say this: some of your items would be my items. To the word. I feel your pain, I really do.

(Oh, and thank you for the tag, even if I'm being rude by not following up on it!)